This is part four of my series on phone game.  Click here to view my previous articles.

As with my previous articles, everything mentioned below is a guideline only.  These rules are not set in stone!  You have to adapt and calibrate your actions as you go.

Once you’ve built some comfort and had at least one conversation with her on the phone already, it’s time to set up your Day-2. Hopefully, you’ve already seeded a possible hangout when you #-closed her, or at least during your previous phone call(s) so all you have to do is invite her to something you are already doing.

The problem here is that different women have their own sets of social anxieties. Some women will have no problem showing up alone with you and all your friends for some chicken wings, others will only feel comfortable hanging out with your if they have a lot of their friends around, while others may only feel comfortable if it’s just the two of you hanging out together in a very public place.

The most effective approach to this is to give her two options to hanging out with you. My standard Day-2 line is (and I think I got this from Lovedrop): “We’re all doing our weekly wing-night on Wednesday, you should come along. Bring some friends if you want. Or, I’m going shopping on Thursday for a new shirt and you could come help me pick one out.” This way she can choose whichever option will be the most comfortable for her as well as the most convenient (she may actually be busy on one of those days). I say almost the exact same thing every time. I just change out the days and events as necessary.

If she says she wants to bring friends, let her know that it’s fine but make sure you bring some too. Girls and a wingman are ideal here. If you can, try to throw in something to insinuate that you are expecting her to bring her girlfriends, and not her orbiting guy friends (I made this mistake too many times back in the day and it really complicates things). But be prepared that she might bring a guy anyway.

You should also be prepared for her throwing out a counter-offer and suggesting that you do something with her and her friends. Do not take this as an IOD! It is more than likely just a means for preserving her own comfort levels. This will happen from time to time, and unless it’s a large event she wants you to come to, expect to just show up by yourself. And if it is a large event, don’t ask her if you can bring someone, just show up your wing or (preferably) wing-girl.

Just like when you #-closed her to begin with, talk to her a bit more for a few minutes once you set up the hang out and then get off the phone. You can call or text her if you feel it necessary during the days leading up to your day-2, but it is not required. Once again, calibrate it based on the amount of time between your hang-out and how interested she appears to be. You don’t want to be that guy that calls her every day before you hang out just to remind her of the fact that she is supposed to hang out with you (especially if, like me, you set your days-2’s up for within only a few days of your call). But at the same time, there may be occasions when you will need to call or text her at some point (like if there is an extended period in between the conversation and the future day-2). In some sets, if I feel like I need to keep her buying temperature up until we see each other I like to send silly little texts like the ones I listed in part 1. Or I’ll just send her a quick message to let her know about something funny or interesting that just happened.

Try to use your best judgment here. What you will need to do will vary from woman to woman and you’ll eventually just get a sense for it with practice.

When you reach the day of the day-2, you should definitely call her to finalize your plans. I personally never assume that an arrangement to meet up is set in stone simply because in this day and age plans can change instantly and without notice. I always call my target before the day-2, usually in the afternoon if our hang-out is in the evening. I try to keep this call short and sweet because I want more to talk about when we actually meet, but it’s usually best to talk for a minute or two about your respective days before bringing up the meet. As long as you don’t come off as if you are just using filler conversation to avoid bringing up the date (which will come off as insecure and needy), it will help you seem a little less eager to hang out with her. The conversation should have the same vibe that you would have with your friends if you called them up to talk about your plans for the evening.

Next week: how your voicemail can be your wingman when you’re not around!