“You’re hot. Want to come back to my place?”

Here in Toronto, we have the “Vomit Comet” (streetcars and city buses that run all night) and there’s always – ALWAYS – some creeper trying to make a last-ditch effort to score at 3:00am with such golden lines as the one above.

Dude, not only you were obviously too cheap to take a cab home, but the fact that this was your opener means that you failed so much at trying to get laid all night at the meat-market clubs that you’re now just begging for scraps anywhere you can. How did you actually think this would work?